March 227, 2009 @ 6:52am

Funky fabulous phenomenal flavorful freaky fun-filled feverish flowering fantastic Friday.
I'm sitting here in my birthday suit and wondering why I haven't done this before. I slept extremely well last night, it feels so good to find the morning a surprise and nestled in a bout of newfound energy. I have been struggling with sleep but the truth is this is not the first time that I have discovered the benefits of a good session of masturbation. Of course, I yearned for more but there is nothing like going there with yourself, nothing compares except when it is done with someone you care about but I had a good time with myself, unleashed some of the fire that has been lingering between my thighs for the last lifetime. I can't remember when I wasn't always horny? Actually I don't ever want to lose this insatiable appetite I have, it might be the reason why I don't use drugs or alcohol or why I have a high level of energy without a caffeine fix, it's interesting.
I had the most pleasant of dreams where my kids brought me by three dogs, I can't tell the kind of dogs but they were adorable. Two of them were siblings, one black and one white, they kind of resembled the body shape of a poodle but poodlesque at all, bigger, friendlier and they loved me. Then there was this third dog, it snuck in with the other two because no one knew where it came from, it was a mut and I could see myself in the dog, see the compassion and struggle to be decent and good. What was most interesting was this man, who was my boyfriend and the more I think about this part, the more I get excited because I'm hoping that my dream of being in a relationship with a man is coming true. So, he walked the dogs and spent so much time helping me take care of them. He was trying to convince, me to keep them and was offering to help me. I could tell from the dream that we lived together and this was nice. I loved the way he cared for the animals and the way he cared for my children who are now grown.
There is this part of me that is convinced that a relationship is on the verge of blossoming. I'm continually preparing myself for a partnership, thinking about what I have to give in a relationship and the multiple ways in which I am making room and time to love someone. I recognize some really basic things about the importance and function of intimate coupling. I'm anxious to have someone to hug every single day, to kiss, to rub against, to snuggle up with, to be sexual with every day (I pray, lol) and to give of my time and energy. Someone I can listen to, fix meals for, support and comfort. I'm excited to be that someone who allows a person to be who they are and to provide them with a solid and conscious commitment to love them unconditionally. To look in this persons eyes and see what is divinely ordained, heavenly sent and masterfully created for our benefit. I don't know the specifics, the who, the where, the how, the what, I just know the time has come and it certainly is an interesting time to be bringing a lover into my space and it's the perfect time whenever it happens.
I like the simplicity of my life right now, I'm enjoying the space of consciousness and I'm open to endless possibilities. I'm enjoying my body, my big body, my naked body and the perfection it reveals. I love the way I feel in my body, the good physical health, the sensuality, the energy and the look of contentment amidst my face. I used to think I was extremely ugly but now I look in the mirror and wonder where I came up with that, I am pleasantly enjoying the youthful look, the sexy eyes and full lips. I am kinda cute when you get right down to it and it's a blessing to feel this way about myself. I am overjoyed to realize what is really awesome and good for me. Good about me and good in me. Thank the stars it's Friday and with warmer weather in the horizon, I will enjoy the majesty of the outdoors this weekend and I will enjoy the majesty of self love and I will enjoy this gif of life as best as I possibly can.
I am perfect and I am whole and I am complete. I LOVE ME.