January 20, 2009 @ 8:38am

Good Morning Life! It's a great day but just the beginning. I can't help but think of Barbara Jordan, what a day this woud be for her, for all her blood, sweat and tears, to see this moment in history, I'm sure she's looking down and she's super duper proud. And I'm proud for her and I carry her spirit with me on this day. I haven't really cried yet, haven't let out the true emotions that lie just below the surface and yet it's not the tears that I want, it's the affirmation that comes with this and all along I knew that we as a people were entitled to be successful too. I was never one of those who said I wouldn't live to see this day but nor was I one to say that I would live to see the day, I just kept the faith, held out all hope and felt an inner knowing that when I look back at, I can't quite figure out how and why I had it. I remember the days during the campaign when folks would say, but I'm worried he might get killed and I stayed focus and quieted people's concerns and assured them that we are part of a new country, a country that knows it can't get away with shooting black leaders like they did back in the 60's. I'moften surprised to hear from people who remember my words, they thank me and although I know I did it, I can't specifically recall when.
Inside of me has been this struggle of blackness, this color idenity and the innate desire to simply be the person that I am irrespective of this physical covering, this biological etching or sensory essence. I've always felt a sense of entitlement to justice, I've felt no need to fit into boxes or call myself other than by the words that make me feel alive like: Spirit, doer, lover, laughter, creative energy, painter, helper, gentle, smiley, genuine, patient, connected, bright, alive, caring or in the moment, these are the boxes I'd be most happy to climb in for they have no walls, no barriers, no clear boundaries and are as expansive as the universe. This interconnectedness with other human beings has been my souls search, my souls reaching, my souls touching, my souls desire for a resting place with room to play, to grow, to change, to fall into who I was always meant to be.
I've often felt exhausted by the responsibility of being black and at one point wanted to lay down the armor but today it is lightened, blending into personhood with a richness, a pride, an evenness that is effortless and simplistic. As a lover of history, as a lover of the story of black people, my ancestors who have endured so that I can sit up here at work and blog, I think of my mother who pick cotton, how wonder how many of those days when picking cotton did it cross her mind that there would be a black president. She probably never wasted her time with thoughts like that but what she did was she kept picking her cotton, kept reading her books, learning her mathematics and dreaming of a day when she would leave the south, leave the constraints of blackness, leave the fields of contemptment and bigotry, she spent her time and mind on greater thoughts, on brighter days and better times. It's no wonder we have Obama today, he is the culmination of black folks who kept there eyes on the prize, kept the true measure of justice in plain view and who never gave up on their humanity.
Congratulations Barack H. Obama, you made my brother, you picked your own cotton, you kept the fire in the belly fed with kindle and soft urging. I am proud of you, proud of your black maleness that is compassionate, loving, intelligent, flawed but never stuck, your connection to people, your power to bring us back to the tenents of our constitution and to the true power of a people which is with themselves. You're the male role model that I've been looking for and that's not to ignore the many black men who have been supportive and nurturing in my life. I say to you thank you for wanting better for all of us, even those of us who don't know any better. And thank you for resurrecting belief in an American that felt nearly dead, a democracy that felt buried in a drawer and the idea of social justice that seemed relegated to a text book, thank you for bringing back the pursuit of happiness, liberty and justice for all.
I'd be remiss to say that I felt as if MLK got second billing yesterday. You too Dr. King was an influential force and maybe second billing is only an indication that we don't need days like this to remind us of the rights we desire because maybe as we go forward from today, we have the rights we always deserved and folks like MLK can be just a memory of a time, time long ago when we had to struggle.
I feel as if today is more than just a celebration, it's a mourning, it's the excitement of the newness and the laying to rest of the old. Much like Jesus as POC, the oppressed and so forth, today we lay down our cross and we give up victimhood, we embrace what is rightfully ours with a renewed sense of entitlement and we march forward knowing that we are the light of the the world.
Today's affirmation from www.scienceofmind.com: In this moment I embrace all life. I quiet myself, go within, and remember all that is important in my life. I accept all my blessings and know all is well. The truth is this, all is well. All is well.
I am perfect and I am whole and I am complete. I LOVE ME.